I am sex starved at home so I have been having wild affair with possessive lover – The Sun

DEAR DEIDRE: I HAD a wild fling to get what I’ve been missing at home.

The guy meant nothing to me but the sex was fantastic.


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My husband has a sexual problem. He stopped getting aroused years ago.

I am 43 and he is 52. After years of heartbreaking discussions, he saw his GP and got Viagra.

He used one tablet, said it gave him a headache and that was that.

I used to think I was the problem, so I lost weight to make myself super-sexy.

I wore short skirts at home and bought fancy underwear.

My husband used to touch my bottom as I walked past and get turned on but still he couldn’t perform.

I was so frustrated. I’d become addicted to wanting sex.

I met my lover when I was out with the girls one evening celebrating a birthday. We’d booked a taxi and were all well away.

This guy and his mate chatted us up in a bar. It was all lighthearted but he gave me his number.

After looking at it for a couple of weeks, I messaged him and we met up.

He is a year younger than me. We didn’t have sex that night but we did the following night and it was like turning on a tap.

I had been denied sex and loving for so long, I went crazy and wanted it all the time.

But after a few months my lover grew quite possessive, demanding I stay over at his place and asking questions about my home life, which I kept very private.

I broke up with him but I wonder now whether I did the right thing.

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I cried myself to sleep at night for weeks but have stayed with my husband because I do love him.

We have grown-up children who love us dearly and they would be devastated if we broke up.

After one row about our lack of a sex life I told my husband I was leaving him.

But he persuaded me to come back. He gave me the impression he was going to seek professional help but nothing has changed. That was a year ago.

To him, I am the perfect partner. We both like holidays, football, drinking at the pub — none of which we can do.

We are lucky to live in a lovely house in a great area. But I feel so frustrated.

DEIDRE SAYS: Partly sexual and partly emotional frustration, I should think, that your husband just isn’t making the effort you deserve trying to solve his sexual problem.

Many men feel such a failure if they suffer from erection failure, they go into denial rather than admit something needs sorting.

Try to avoid any suggestion he is a failure for not satisfying you.

Focus on how much you love him and say you are worried about his health – as erection problems can be a warning sign.

Initiate regular sex-play with no pressure to perform.

My e-leaflet Your Man Losing His Erection? explains self-help steps. He can still give you orgasms without needing an erection.

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